TRM enjoys a wonderful mix of tourist fishos during peak tourist summer months. At the moment, it is like a little United Nations. Fishy inmates are from UK, Canada (the 51st state?), Australia, etc. The longest booking is for six weeks of fishing. So we get to know them better than other motel overnighters. Surprisingly, the closure of the Desert Road has made little difference. For the next two weeks we are booked out due to Lake Otamangakau re-opening on Saturday – after being closed by fishery managers, DOC, all February.

But we have enjoyed catching up with guests as they return to stay longer each year. Some have been regulars since before we came here 20 years ago. Most of them know each other, so socialising is always a priority. Last night the lucky guest in Unit 7 cooked us gourmet smoked trout (what else?) for dinner. (That pays for his raft hire.)

When they arrive, we usually enjoy a good old natter to catch up on their lives since their last visit. From the “meet & greet” comments, SWMBO has also been carrying out Her little management experiment – Her aim was to try to identify the most important issues on their mind. During February, She has been holding Her personal survey, so you might find it interesting too.

The guests complaint priority list goes something like this:

1 Weather. What a surprise… This is not the usual TV weather type banter as everyone agrees they are often wrong and usually misleading. Fishy guests are more focused on any likely effects on fishing time. The important stuff. Lake O is very exposed and subject to wind issues. Is any rain in the forecast? We are in the middle of drought conditions in the central plateau generally. The local weather discussion usually includes an update on the latest local swarms of little earthquakes and whether they spooked the trout. (27 Feb – Another magnitude 4.6 earthquake has struck off the East Cape)

2 Medical. These discussions are more to update us on the latest medical diagnosis of their elderly ailments and new replacement parts since their last fishing trip or visit in 2024. As most are retired their list can get extensive, (particularly if it affects their casting ability). This topic has become so important that Management (SWMBO) was considering a new office sign banning any discussion on getting older. Once they start listing their ageing medical problems, some cannot stop. The reception can turn into a confessional.

3 Roading. A new topic has been the closure of the Desert Road on SH1 for January and February. It only became important if it restricted their access to Lake O. Otherwise, the usual complaints continue about NZTA’s stupidity indicated by the plague of thousands of orange cones. So far we have suffered two broken windscreens – stones flicked up from road repairs this summer. Everyone is looking forward to the end of SH1 roadworks so their trip can be smooth and relaxed without dodging pot holes.

4 Politics. Boring…. I’ve tried to change the subject and liven it up by mentioning Trump but most just scoff as they think he is a clown! The general consensus is amazement that he was voted in at all. He makes NZ political hiccups appear so petty and boring. TRM inmates are far more intelligent and appreciative of NZ’s isolation – fortunately reinforced by the big Tasman Sea moat separating us from the rest of the world. (Not one mention of the Chinese Navy.) Any big world issues involving Putin or Palestine or global warming or pollution or rugby results do not qualify for TRM’s confessional. There are far more interesting topics, like trout fishing.

5 TRM’s flowers. Inmates still remark on how pretty all the flowers are outside reception although they are past their best now. I take full credit for them of course. The flowers are SWMBO’s cunning scheme to distract tourists from inspecting the quaint old motel units too closely. They reek of historic character. Sixty years ago the unit adjacent reception was the village shop! See below:

6 Crime. Everyone expresses their disgust on how “under-age” kids are out of control. Police are useless as they cannot prosecute them. The inmates have read about our own issues trying to keep an eye open for feral kids. Last week two called in demanding us to top up their bottle of meths! But our discussion with visitors indicates it is the same everywhere else as well.

7 Dogs. So many comment on how nice it is to see such friendly pet dogs at a motel. That makes me suspicious they might be hiding their scruffy mutt in their car. Petting dogs warms the cockles of the heart and overcome any greeting formalities.

8 Everything else that is wrong in the rest of the world has not reached Turangi. After a reviving therapeutic stroll down the Tongariro River trail, they all insist we live in Paradise. Without hesitation, we enthusiastically concur.

New guests arrive exhausted from the stress of avoiding pot holes, are immediately cheered up by the casual relaxed atmosphere and positive outlook of other fishy inmates and their dogs. Before they register, they brace themselves on arthritic orthotic-supported geriatric feet to withstand the warm fuzzies from determined doggy loves before unleashing their concerns for SWMBO’s growing list of grievances.

Life is good at TRM.

Some ask where the guest laundry is and how much does it cost? (Free for guests) Nobody wants to inspect their units first. Some ask where the river is – for their recreational walk. The anglers had all been here before and were familiar with the fishy amenities like rod holders, wader drying cupboards, smoke-house, wading poles, boat parking and fish cleaning facilities.

But did you miss the obvious?

Amazingly, or worryingly, SWMBO’s list of topics for discussion indicates they never asked or worried about the trout fishing. They don’t need to. They know… Everywhere else the end of February might signal the end of summer fishing, but here in Turangi everyone is soaking up the fine warm weather. TRM anglers are soooo confident. And modest too…

They confirm it is undoubtedly, the Trout Fishing Capital of the World!