Global Warming?

For your Easter reading entertainment, following the shock announcement from Toe-paw Council – that global warming will flood TRM (?)… see the previous report. Thank you for your interest in this absorbing unfolding drama. As a result SWMBO (She Who Must Be Obeyed manages everything at the motel and is always right?) has completed initial investigations as follows:

Senior executive staff in waders and lifejackets checking out rafts ready for a mass evacuation if/when flooding occurs.

In the interests of the health and safety of inmates, TRM’s research team investigated how long Toe-paw Council have hidden this global warming theory from NZ’s history?. Needless to say, SWMBO is now another “expert” in global warming and climate change. To investigate the flood hazard possible likelihood at TRM She explored back through many centuries to prove that this has been around for a long long time – longer than any written records recorded in NZ. Global warming has been with us since the ice age.

The official Government map from 1955 included Tongariro River pools before there was any Turangi township development. The town was not even a village and comprised a main road corner garage and three shops.

If you consider Her legal defence strategy is a little wacky, it has to be to match the ridiculous Toe-paw Council theory that only TRM will flood from global warming. We cannot explain how other surrounding properties will remain unaffected? As NZ’s laws and legal principles originally arrived on sailing ships from England (with more recent help in clarifying subtle legal interpretation changes by Tuwharetoa) She decided to research there first. All this is necessary to prepare TRM’s case for the Environment Court – to appeal Toe-paw Council’s claim that TRM is in a flood hazard zone due to global warming (?). As TRM’s legal defence budget had already been exceeded SWMBO will act and report on your behalf. Regular readers appreciate She has never ever been found to be wrong. No doubt Council will have an expensive legal team led by a QC as they will need several other consultants on archaeology, history, planning, geography, hydro-engineering, surveying, etc. to question SWMBO’s evidence.  Council can afford a big team as ratepayers will be funding them.  The Environment Court hearing should last about two months as it has to cover more than just TRM – read on…


The official Government map in 1955 has the Taumaranui-Tokaanu “state highway” located in the middle of the residential area of Turangi township.

The Environment Court prefer “written evidence”.  The best-written evidence of global warming was from England during the first time records were kept about 1000 years ago to determine whether global warming has been a continuing geographical weather feature since Anglo-Saxon times. To save you having to persevere any further, we can confirm it has, but we suspect you need more proof than that….

This image is mainly included to keep your attention. The remains of the Tongariro River swingbridge – anglers access footbridge – taken after the February 1958 flood The flood was obviously due to global warming although there had been a week of heavy rain before to increase the flow.

We all know that global warming has continued since the ice age but as there were no legally acceptable records we preferred irrevocable evidence in writing from 1000 years ago. Back then vast inaccessible brackish swamps full of brown trout were the main difference in topography between the English countryside in the 9th century – and what are now revered as England’s “green and pleasant land”. This is from factual historical records. In the 10th century East Anglia, the “Wash” flowed into Middle England fenland of more than a thousand square miles where cattle had to be rounded up (between fishing for brown trout) by boat. Half of Staffordshire consisted of peat and moss swamps. Much of the Thames Valley was a marsh, etc. As a result of global warming all these regions have now dried out. That concludes today’s historic geography lesson…

To continue the global warming carnage, this is after the February 2004 flood which exceeded 1400 cumecs, compared to the present flow around 21 cumecs. The damage was from mature trees swept down the river and into the bridge. This proves again how devastating global warming can be.

In modern times, about 50 years ago in Turangi, the Tongariro River was subject to changes from the Tongariro Hydro Power Project involving dams and canals to divert about half the flow via Lake Rotoaira and then through another tunnel to churn the turbines in the Tokaanu Power Station. The result is the flows on the Tongariro are much less than they were. Yet even back then at full flow TRM had never flooded. So it is curious to now imagine how it will happen at half the previous natural flow?

Repairs to the Koura Street swingbridge after apocalyptic climate warming flood in 2004 – when TRM remained unaffected?

The best local evidence of climate change was unearthed during excavations for the Tokaanu Power Station tail-race.  The Ministry of Works (MOW) appointed an archaeologist (Trevor Hosking) to carefully record everything. Much of his discoveries are contained in a book on his life “A Museum Underfoot”.  He found villages and many burial sites and artefacts which were carbon dated as 4th century – about 8-900 years before the first Maori fleet arrived in NZ.  The Environment Court will love all this stuff.

The small crosses mark the re-burial terrace for over 70 remains unearthed from the moa hunter era.

These early moa hunters remains were reburied in an existing cemetery above Tokaanu.  

Trevor Hosking’s excavations and research back in 1970 confirmed these first inhabitants were fair skinned with red hair. The possibility of an Environment Court hearing provided the incentive to trace some local fair-skinned red-heads whose DNA can be traced back to the Tokaanu excavations.  Their oral family history will confirm the Tongariro flooding pattern back then did not affect TRM. Our research will assist their landmark case being prepared to recover all their lands that they occupied for several hundred years before Maori arrived.

The cemetery above Tokaanu with Lake Taupo in the distance.

Back in the 4th century the original Tongariro River was still building the wide delta that the town now occupies.  Back then river flowed from about where the Hydro Pool is opposite Mangamawhitiwhiti Stream directly north-west along the route of SH41.  In the 4th century AD the river mouth was close to where the Tokaanu Power Station was built.  All this proves conclusively that global warming is not a new weather pattern and has been contributing to aggradation for the last 1600 years.

To complete Her research programme a comprehensive search was taken in rivers far and wide, in unexplored regions in the middle of the North Island as far away from the sea (safe from tsunamis?) as possible in NZ, ending up in small remote rivers west of Owhango at Kaitieke. Despite being distracted by brown trout, ancient stones from long before the pre-maori moa hunter era were discovered that had once laid under the sea. The deposits of tiny shellfish embedded in mud are still clearly evident as illustrated below. These perished remains were from many years before written records – even before SWMBO!. They provide tangible clues of how long global warming has been around, even if there was no written history back then.

Only now Toe-paw Council decided in their wisdom that the global warming phenomena will not only cause flooding, but they can anticipate flooding in the very spot where I am typing this. Quite amazing vision. TRM has been on this site for over 60 years without any reports of flooding but that is irrelevant according to the council boffins dreaming of future disasters waiting to happen. More peculiar, only TRM will be affected. Those many properties between TRM and the river are apparently exempt. Even adjoining properties will not be affected by global warming floods. Only TRM? Very strange…

Above is a (drone?) image of TRM in 1959, Taupahi Road in the foreground. The SH1 and Piri (Link) Roads have been developed since. It was taken by leaning out of the cabin of a Tiger moth biplane, trying to reveal wet swampland surrounding the motel. The undeveloped land proved to be dry pumice which had never seen a flood in the last thousand years. But Toe-paw Council are so convinced it will flood they have introduced new building height levels etc. in anticipation.