Daily Archives: February 20, 2012

Tongariro River Motel is now “officially” FIVE STAR accommodation

Posted on February 20th, 2012

Tongariro River Motel is now 5 ***** STAR accommodation…?

This is a new “first”!  The report in TRM’s Guest Comments is actually from SWMBO (She Who Must Be Obeyed is the Manager at Tongariro River Motel (“TRM”).  Yes, you should be very suspicious too.  She is so modest and has graciously accepted TRM’s revised five star rating from a google review which read as follows:

elmuzzerino‎ – 16 Jan 2011  Always friendly and great location. Heaps of room and a little bit of old fashioned charm. Superb!

SWMBO was naturally absolutely delighted when, on the recommendation of a guest, She googled “Motel Turangi” to discover, to Her astonishment, with the above comment Google had re-rated and upgraded TRM to FIVE ***** STAR accommodation.  Before you jump to conclusions we should emphasise this upgrading is nothing at all to do with the trout caught by our guests.

Just as exciting was the image of TRM repeated on right.  Don’t think I would want to stay there…  That is in fact the boat marker pole somewhere down the Tongariro River beside the Downs Pool.  How it represents TRM is a bit of a mystery?.  But at least their other images showed some of the huge trout our inmates catch in the Tongariro River…  While we are being truthful we should admit not all our trout are quite as big as those shown in Google’s review.   But you may have guessed that.

So after some surfing around the net we find Google have taken the images from one of our famous daily fishing reports dated 18 September 2009?.

Now we don’t want to spoil the party but we have to be credible too.  So we provide this correction for prospective guests.  Tongariro River Motel star rating by Google is incorrect.  We are not five star or even 4 star.  Once upon a time when TRM was a member of the Golden Chain franchise a Qualmark inspector awarded TRM 3 1/2 (Three and a half) star rating.  But we even question that.  If you ever choose a motel purely on the basis of their star rating then we pity you.  SWMBO thought the Qualmark inspections were a joke.  Qualmark’s system may have been effective last century but now everyone can browse the web to check out motels for themselves far better than relying on a snooty inspector from Qualmark.   So SWMBO strongly recommends you should only read “personal” recommendations from people you can rely on.. like SWMBO?.

The truth is, even TripAdvisor reviews are questionable.  The worst one TRM had from 2010 criticised our restaurant???  We tried for two years asking TripAdvisor to correct that, without success.  The simple error is that TRM do not have any restaurant so they must have been referring to another motel…  But would they delete it?  No way….

So we just thought you should know – if anyone asks TRM are now officially a “5 star” motel and unofficially a delightful relaxed comfortable and affordable place to stay.  To be even more accurate, TRM is probably the furthest thing from a five star Qualmark endorsed lodge hotel accommodation that you will ever have the joy to stay in.  At least that’s what our guests say…